Surrogacy at Its Best?

I came across this story on the web this AM.   It seems to me to illustrate surrogacy at its finest.   Because I’ve gone at length about surrogacy at a number of different times  in the past, and because I am deeply skeptical of much about surrogacy, I thought it might be worth lingering here for a few moments. 

Jamie Underwood Collins is 8 1/2 months pregnant with a baby that is intended for a New York couple.    She’s married and has four kids of her own.   While she’s being paid something around $25,000 it doesn’t seem that the need for money was her primary motivation.   Rather, this was something Collins wanted to do for someone.   There’s nothing shameful about being a surrogate, at least as Collins sees it.   (She wears a T-shirt that says “This is not my husband’s baby” on the front and “But it’s not mine either.  I’m a proud surrogate” on the back.  

Lesbian Mothers in Montana after Kulstad

Not long ago I wrote about Kulstad v. Maniaci,  an opinion from the Montana Supreme Court involving separated lesbian mothers.    As a result of the case, Michelle Kulstad gained a form of legal recognition as a parent in her struggle with her former partner, Barbara Maniaci.

The same court has now decided a second case, Filpula v.  Ankney, arising from a somewhat similar situation.   This one doesn’t break new ground, as does the last one.   It simply makes it more clear how the law in Montana will operate.    That’s worth noting because having a clear understanding of how the law in Montana will operate ought to eliminate the need for (some) litigation. 

Filpula arises in a familiar context.   Linda Filpula  and Dustine Ankney were in a relationship for twelve years.   

Sperm Donors and Fathers

This story appeared in what was once our local paper and is now internet only.   (And it looks like they picked it up from Redbook.)  It’s a fine account of one’s man discovery that he and his wife needed to use a sperm donor and his thoughts about that process.  

I don’t suppose I have all that much to add to it, though it ties back to lengthy discussions on this blog about sperm donors (anonymous and otherwise.)     Like many people who have written here, Gary Blitt wasn’t sure how he’d feel about a child conceived with donor sperm.   But as time passes, there’s no question that he is his daughter’s father.  He’ll be the one to teach her to read box scores and change the diapers.  

Perhaps it is true, as he says, that his sperm wouldn’t even have been as good as the donor’s was.   But what is more important to me, at least, as that every day in real life he is the father of this child.  

A quick run through some news on lesbian and gay parents

Again, my apologies for the lengthy silence.  First I was travelling and in my travels, I managed to contract the H1N1 flu.  I’m prepared to affirm that it is a nasty bug.   I am not yet out of quarantine, but at least I am feeling human again.  

A couple of recent items on lesbian and gay parents.  (I actually think there were more than two, but I’ve lost track.) 

First, here’s a current item from France.   France permits single people to adopt, including single lesbians and gay men, does not permit lesbian and gay couples to adopt.   The rationale?   The absence of a different sex role model in a lesbian or gay couple.  

Men as Parents and the Power of Public Appreciation

There was a story in yesterday’s New York Times that I thought worth a little discussion.  The story was in the science section and is about fathers and parenthood.  (I am not sure the NYT headline really suits the article, but that’s really beside the point.)   It made me think about some of the recent discussion here. 

One thing the article notes is detrimental effect of social messaging that excludes men/fathers.   These paragraphs caught my attention: 

Uninvolved fathers have long been accused of lacking motivation. But research shows that many societal obstacles conspire against them. Even as more fathers are changing diapers, dropping the children off at school and coaching soccer, they are often pushed aside in ways large and small.

Adoptive Parents and the Genetic Link

There’s been ongoing discussion here  (that link is just one example) about the importance of a genetic connection between parent and child.  As I have made clear, I am not persuaded that a person who can claim a genetic link with a child should therefore been recognized as a legal parent.   Hence, I think a man who provides sperm to a woman need not be the father of that child.   Others have strongly disagreed.  We’ve had long discussions about it. 

Arguably, this isn’t simply a matter of opinion.  This is a question where there might be useful evidence to consider and occasional reference has been made to one or another study of some of the questions raised.     I read a paper the other day which makes an interesting contribution here.   It’s from the American Sociological Review, February 2007 and is by Laura Hamilton, Simon Cheng Brian Powell.  (I’ve linked you to the table of contents the article is not on-line.  If anyone wants a copy, you can e-mail me.)  

The authors wanted to examine the importance of biological ties for parental investment.  

What Does It Mean That A Child is “Yours?”: Thinking About ART Mistakes

Here’s a thought-provoking piece from The Guardian, UK.   It ties back to some of my earlier thoughts about ART mistakes. (The most recent string was occasioned by the “wrong embryo” case featured on the Today show not so long ago.)  

As the article notes, while uncertainty about paternity has been around forever, uncertainty about maternity is a new problem.   Time was a woman gave birth and we knew she was the mother.   Now?  She may not be legally recognized as the mother of the child (because in a jurisdiction that enforces surrogacy agreements a woman who gives birth is not necessarily a mother).   And she may be legally recognized, but she may not be genetically related to the child.   In this brave new world, women as well as men may now need to ask ”Is this child mine?”   

This question–is the child mine-is a fascinating one.   To say that this thing or that thing is mine is to claim possession.   Children, of course, are not possessions, nor can they be possessed.   As it is used in this article (and in the Michael Jackson’s Billie Jean) the question is really one about genetic lineage–was my genetic material used to create this child

So Maybe Being A Parent IS All About Sex?

Under the laws of many states (including Washington) and in the Uniform Parentage Act the parental status of some men turns on the precise means by which the crucial sperm entered the mother’s body:  If sperm is introduced via intercourse than the man is a father while if it is introduced any other way, he is not.   I have commented in the past  that this seems a very odd place to draw a line. 

People of differing views might well share this opinion.   If you think genetics is the  crucial determinant of parental status, then the man is a father no matter how the sperm is delivered.  If you think intent is critical, then the man may or may not be a father–engaging in intercourse is no guarantee of intent to parent.   If you tend towards function (as I typically do) then the man may or may not be a father, but it has little to do with the actual delivery of the sperm.   And so on through the tests I’ve discussed.   

Even when I might disagree in substance (as I do with the genetics-is-fatherhood stance) I find it sensible that sex/no sex is not where a line is drawn.  

Father if Married, Married if Male?

I thought I’d discuss a case recently highlighted in Professor Art Leonard’s blog.   To my mind, this case illustrates the peculiarity of having status as a parent turn on the existence of a formal legal relationship between two adults.   I cannot gain access to the full opinion (you need a subscription service) so I’ll go with the facts as Professor Leonard recites them.

KB was born female but began living as a male as a teenager.  He began living with JR, who is female, in 1998, which is the same year that he legally changed his name.   JR was aware that KB had been born female.

After KB changed his name, he and JR obtained a marriage license and were married.   I assume this was in New York and New York does not currently permit (nor did it then permit) two women to marry.  Because KB was still legally a woman (even though he had changed his name), KB and JR’s marriage was likely not permissible.   However, it appears no one paid any attention to this little detail at the time.   (The issues surrounding marital status of transgender people are numerous and really beyond the scope of this blog.)

Four years later, KB and JR decided to have a child together.    

News from the UK: Gay Fathers Reflect

I seem to have allowed myself a de facto sabbatical from my blog last week.   My apologies to you all, but I suppose I needed the time away.   Anyway, I’ll gear myself back up now. 

Here’s a story about gay fathers in the UK.  It isn’t really a story, though. It’s six gay men/couples talking about their experiences adopting in the UK.   Not the sort of thing you see in the mainstream press all that often, really.  

I’ve been thinking a good deal about gay men and parenthood recently, though I haven’t had occasion to write about it for a while.   One so often lumps together “gay and lesbian” parents.  Yet parenthood is deeply gendered (surely I’ve said this thirty times?) and so lumping lesbian and gay parents together misses as much as it captures.