For the last several posts I’ve been working out an argument that a man shouldn’t be considered the father of a child who results from a one-night-stand. That’s really just a specific iteration of a more general argument I want to make that genetic linkage ought not to determine ones status as a parent. If you’re just joining this, you might want to jump back a few posts and work forward to here. You might also want to check out the various disclaimers I set out, just so you’re clear about what I am and am not saying.
For now I want to keep the focus on what my proposal might mean for children. Though that is not the only perspective that matters to me, it’s the one many people will want to consider first. There are two related points I want to make. The first I spelled out already a couple of days ago. Here’s the second.
Even if he isn’t a father, the man who provides 1/2 of a child’s genes might be an important person for the child to know about and perhaps to know. If that’s so, then the law should be structured to make that a more likely outcome. Though it may seem counter-intuitive, deciding that the man is not a father can encourage just this.
I’ll consider this in the specific case of a sperm donor first, to lay out the argument. Then (probably tomorrow) I’ll move to the more general case.
Remember that in some states a donor is a father (unless of course the woman is married.) New York is such a state, as Massachusetts. In other states, a donor is, by operation of law, not a father. (California and Washington are examples.)
Now one main reason women use donor sperm to conceive a child is to create a family that does not have a man present. (The other would be women involved with men who could not produce sperm. I can come back to that another time.) A woman inseminating with donor sperm in New York might therefore worry about possible claims of paternity by the donor. (A good lawyer would probably tell her she should.) The surest way to protect against this eventuality is to use a truly anonymous donor, one who can never be traced back.
By contrast, a woman in Washington need not have this concern. Even if she uses a known donor, the donor is not a father. Surely this means that a woman in Washington is more likely to consider and ultimately choose a known donor than is a woman in New York. Consequently, children in states where a donor is not a father are more likely to have access to information about the donor than are those in states where the donor is a father. So if the goal is the increase the likelihood that children will have access to this sort of information, then “donor is not father” is the better law.
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